Choosing which schools to apply to is one of the earliest and most consequential decisions in this process. That said, here is the tension: it's time and cost prohibitive to apply too broadly (between essays, interviews, and fees). But at the same time, when you're first starting out, it's difficult to gain a real sense for a school and therefore difficult to feel confident narrowing your scope.
This article is organized into four sections: academic fit, cultural and community fit, cost and financial aid fit, and a practical framework for building your school list.
Academic Fit
Rigor and Curriculum Breadth
All eight schools are rigorous and offer a comprehensive curriculum, as well as specialty programs. All have first-class STEM and arts offerings. And all offer introductory through college-level courses.
Any differences will be at the margins; for example, some schools offer a higher ratio / more specialized programs around interdisciplinary studies (e.g., Exeter Innovates), while other schools have strong interdisciplinary offerings, but whose curricula lean more toward departmental silos. Another example are schools that offer interdisciplinary studies about the environment, while also offering on-campus access to a farm (e.g., Choate's Kohler Environmental Center, Hotchkiss's Fairfield Farm, Lawrenceville's Big Red Farm).
With differences at the margin, it's most important that your child does self-inquiry to identify programs and areas of studies that are most meaningful to them, and then to dive deep (via website search / during on campus tours) about those topics.
Teaching Philosophy
The Harkness method—or an equivalent, discussion-based learning, is used at all these schools. Harkness (originating from Exeter) places students around an oval table and asks them to lead discussions, challenge ideas, and defend positions. This is intellectually exhilarating for some students and genuinely uncomfortable for others. It rewards verbal confidence, preparation, and intellectual risk-taking.
Even when more traditional lecture-and-discussion formats are used (e.g., in introductory science and math classes), there will be a high degree of student-led inquiry and discussion. If your child has never been in a Harkness-style environment, it's worth discussing whether they'd find it exciting or anxiety-inducing.
Class Size and Faculty Access
Class sizes across these schools are uniformly small (typically 8–15 students). Many faculty live on campus, and access to teachers outside of class — through office hours, dorm check-ins, informal hallway conversations, is a genuine differentiator from most day schools. This access matters most for students who are self-motivated enough to use it.
Important to note that while all schools have a higher boarding vs. day student ratio, St. Paul's is the only of these eight schools that operates under a 100% residential model. This means not only all students are boarding students, but (as the Admissions Officer who interviewed my daughter noted) all faculty also live on campus (which creates a different environment from, for example Exeter, where the St. Paul's Admissions Officer noted faculty with a certain tenure have the option to live off campus).
Cultural and Community Fit
School Size
Enrollment across the eight schools ranges from roughly 350 students (Groton) to over 1,100+ (Exeter). Size shapes everything: how well students know each other, how competitive the extracurricular environment is, how many faculty advisors are available, and how big the alumni network becomes.
Smaller schools tend to feel more intimate and community-oriented, but with fewer course offerings and club options. Larger schools offer more variety and anonymity, which can be a feature or a bug, depending on your child.
Religious Heritage
Several of these schools have Episcopal roots — Groton, St. Paul's, and Hotchkiss among them — though today they're largely non-denominational in practice.
It is important to note that all schools have 'Chapel,' or a similar concept (at least once, if not four times a week at some schools). Chapel is non-denominational. It is a morning gathering intended to build community and facilitate idea / knowledge exchanges, as well as BAU communications.
If your family has strong religious preferences, in either direction, it's worth understanding the role faith plays in the culture of each school you're considering. For example, while all schools are largely non-denominational in practice, Groton students are required to attend one additional service per week of their own choosing (in addition to four Chapel services during the week). Groton students may choose from: Episcopal / Christian; Friday evening Sabbath; Muslim prayer / study group; Hindu puja / study session; Buddhist sangha meditation; or Roman Catholic Mass.
Boarding Culture and Weekend Life
Some schools are genuinely residential communities where weekends are full, engaging, and central to the experience. Others have meaningful day student populations, which can shape the weekend energy on campus. Before finalizing your list, it's worth asking tour guides and current students: what do you actually do on Saturday afternoon?
The approximate % of boarding students are:
Competitiveness and Collaboration
There's a spectrum here. Some schools cultivate intensely competitive environments where students are acutely aware of each other's grades and accomplishments. Others deliberately build cultures of collaboration and mutual support. It's impossible to get a real sense for whether a school falls into one or the other camp (even from student tour guides). Neither is inherently better. Answering this question may come down to a gut feel (if you have the opportunity to do campus visits), and by probing student tour guides and Admission Officers about what support networks are in place to help students—academically, socially, mentally, and emotionally.
Cost and Financial Aid Fit
Cost should be part of your school selection calculus from the beginning. See How Much Do Boarding Schools Cost? for a detailed breakdown of tuition and fees.
Three things matter here: (1) whether a school is need-blind or need-aware in admissions; (2) whether the school meets 100% of demonstrated need; and (3) how the school's aid formula treats your specific financial situation. See Need Blind vs. Need Aware and Understanding Financial Aid for detail on each.
The practical implication: don't self-select out of schools because the sticker price seems unaffordable. Some of the most expensive schools (Andover, Exeter, Groton) are need-blind and among the most generous with aid. Conversely, don't assume need-aware schools are inaccessible. This requires a more nuanced, school-by-school assessment.
A Practical Framework for Building Your School List
Start With Non-Negotiables
Before researching schools in detail, identify your family's non-negotiables. These might include geography (how far is too far?), school size, specific programs (elite crew team, specific arts curriculum), or financial aid thresholds. Non-negotiables shrink the universe efficiently.
Tier Your List by Fit, Not Just Prestige
The instinct to rank schools by prestige is understandable, but not particularly useful in this context. All eight schools are exceptional. The more useful question is: at which of these schools would my child be happiest and most likely to thrive? That's a different question than which school is most competitive to get into.
Visit Before You Commit to Applying
This may seem obvious, but it's worth stating: if possible, prioritize visiting one or several schools before applying. Campus visits surface things that no website or brochure can convey: the energy of a dining hall, the vibe of a tour guide, the feel of a classroom building. These impressions matter. See Campus Tour Planning for how to make the most of your visits.